Be Shiny in a Sea of Fishes – Mermaids and Thoreau, Part 4
“Be yourself, not your idea of what you think somebody else’s idea of
who you should be.” ~Henry David Thoreau
Today was part four of the series to show the fourth step in the process as well as discuss the fourth part of the quote which deals with our inner critic. Judging yourself will create a barrier to embracing who you really are. You need to accept all of yourself, flaws and all. Afterall, we are all imperfect.
The private conversations you have with yourself can be either a powerful stepping stone or a major obstacle to reaching your goals. Your thoughts greatly influence how you feel and behave which can cause negative self-talk to become downright self-destructive. This leads to a state of mind that isn’t conducive for making positive changes.
If you tend to be overly critical of yourself, you’re not alone. Most people experience self-doubt and harsh self-reflections. Fortunately, however, you don’t have to be a victim of your own verbal abuse.
Here are four ways to tame your inner critic:
Develop an awareness of your thoughts – We get so used to hearing our own narrations that it’s easy to become oblivious to the messages that we’re sending ourselves. Pay attention to what you’re thinking about and recognize that just because you think something, doesn’t mean it’s true.
Stop ruminating – When you make a mistake or you’ve had a bad day, you may be tempted to re-play the events over and over in your head. But, repeatedly reminding yourself of it, will only make you feel worse and it won’t solve the problem.
Replace overly critical thoughts with more accurate statements – Change an overly pessimistic thought to a more rational and realistic statement. When you find yourself thinking, “I never do anything right,” replace it with a more positive statement like, “Sometimes I do things really well and sometimes I don’t.”
Balance acceptance with self-improvement – There’s a difference between always telling yourself that you’re not good enough and reminding yourself that you can work to become better. Accept your flaws for what they are today but resign to work on the issues you want to address.
You cannot be everything. You don’t have to be everything.
You simply have to be you. And that is enough.
Materials for the craft